New Annulment Prime Offers 50% Off; Free Shipping

The Vatican announced today that it’s making faster, easier annulments an option via its brand new delivery system, Annulment Prime. The news confirms reports that surfaced last week indicating that the Vatican was staffing up a new “separation division” to compete with services offered by its protestant competitors. The service will give Annulment Prime members faster annulment options... Read More

Pope Francis Confirms Cats Still Going To Hell

Pope Francis continues to show he’s not your average pope. During a public appearance this afternoon, Francis attempted to comfort a girl whose cat had died, saying, “One day, we will see our animals again in the eternity of Christ. Paradise is open to all of God’s creatures. All of them except for cats. In that case, little girl, the only way you will see your cat again is if... Read More

EWTN Acquires Holy See

Irondale, AL–EWTN Global Catholic Network announced today that it has acquired the Vatican-based Holy See. “EWTN has been a partner with the Holy See for many years, and I am very pleased and excited that this highly respected organization will become a part of the EWTN family of services,” said Network chairman Michael P. Warsaw. “Since its founding two-thousand years... Read More

Women In Love With Married Men Appeal To Pope To Make Fidelity Optional

  VATICAN–A group of 26 Italian mistresses who claim to be having affairs with Catholic men have written a joint letter to Pope Francis begging him to end the Catholic Church’s ban on infidelity. The women, who met through a Facebook campaign, wrote to the Pope requesting a meeting to put forward their case, claiming they were just “a small sample” of the many home... Read More

Second Paul VI Miracle Approved After Priest Gives Homily On Humanae Vitae

VATICAN—Just days after Pope Paul VI moved one step closer to canonization after a miracle required for Beatification was formally approved, an EOTT source inside the Vatican’s Congregation for the Causes of Saints today is saying that a second miracle was approved this morning. A yet to be released report by the Vatican states that an unidentified priest, through the miraculous intercession... Read More

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