People Preparing McCarrick Report Same People As Counting Votes In Nevada
After days of ballot counting in Nevada, officials from the state revealed earlier this morning that they were, in fact, the same people that were... Read More
Mass
Creepy Clown Masses On The Rise
Image: Graeme Maclean Reports out of Cincinnati, Ohio today suggest sightings of Creepy Clown Masses are on the rise nationwide, and at levels not seen since the introduction of the 3rd typical edition of the Roman Missal five years ago. While... Read More
Rookie Monk Out For Advent Season With High Tonsure Sprain
St. Louis rookie Augustinian Brother Ambrose will be sidelined two to three weeks with a high tonsure sprain, The Augustinian Daily is reporting. Ambrose was injured during last Sunday’s Vesper hour after bowing too fast. “I... Read More
Man Drops $10 In Donation Basket Like He’s Some Kind Of Beverly Hills Millionaire
Atherton, CA––In what many witnesses are calling “a stunning act of generosity,” a mysterious parishioner was spotted placing a $10 bill into the donation basket at the St. Mark’s Catholic Church 9:00 am Mass as though... Read More
Thousands Camp Outside Churches In Anticipation Of Black Friday Masses
Hundreds of church-goers stamped into Saint Theresa Parish on Black Friday, 2011, just moments before four are tragically trampled to death. As anticipated, thousands of church-goers have already camped out in front of churches all across the... Read More
View All Articles in this Category...
Libs & Trads
Man Angry That Only Women Can Become Female Priests
Florence Hensley and companions minutes after practicing mass Medford, OR––Speaking at a Women’s Rights group at the home of fellow parishioner Florence... Read More
Jesus Assumes New Role As Savior Emeritus After Catholic Blogger Takes Over Task Of Saving Church From Francis
Catholic blogger Nicholas Robison, best known for his blog, More Catholic Than Jesus, announced today that he has officially assumed the role of Savior of the world,... Read More
Pope Michael Comes To Aid Of Deposed Nigerian Prince; Transfers “Sum of USD 5 Millions”
Belvue, KS––Speaking from his porcelain throne yesterday, Pope Michael announced to those gathered in the papal living room that, as sign of unity between... Read More
Unimaginative Priest Celebrates Themeless Mass
Citing a lack of time and energy, as well as feeling the “total absence of the liturgical muse,” local pastor Fr. Mike Conway this week spent close to no time... Read More
View All Articles in this Category...
Politics
Parishioners Refuse To Stand During The Our Father
[News Brief] Catholics parishioners across the U.S. protested during... Read More
Satanists Sue Fr. Frank Pavone For Copyright Infringement
Officials at the Satanic organization Blaspheme Inc. announced today that... Read More
Planned Parenthood Set To Unveil New Line At Fashion Week
PARIS––The city of Paris has come to a standstill with the anticipation... Read More
Cardinal Burke Calls For “Extreme Vetting” Of Protestant Converts
Image: CanonLawJunkie In a speech in Rome last night, Cardinal Raymond... Read More
View All Articles in this Category...
Vatican
Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI Asks To Be Reinstated As Pope
According to reports yesterday, Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI is seeking the chair... Read More
‘The Walking Pope’ Mid-Season Finale Recap
Season 3 of The Walking Pope has been a downward slide for EWTN who produced the... Read More
Pope Francis Leads Summit On How To Pretend The Church Is Doing Something About The Abuse Scandal
Pope Francis has called the presidents from bishops conferences around the... Read More
Curia Surprises Francis with One-Way Ticket to Buenos Aires
Roman Curia officials pulled out all the stops this year to celebrate the 4th anniversary... Read More