Vatican Press Office Officially Announces All Phone Lines in Vatican To Be Disconnected For Remainder Of Pontificate
VATICAN––The Vatican Press Office Director Father Federico Lombardi issued a statement to the media today concerning Pope Francis’ recent telephone call to a divorced and remarried Argentine woman, in which he supposedly gave her permission to receive Holy Communion. The woman at the center of the story, Jacqui Sabetta, and her ex-husband told reporters that His Holiness told them that “divorced people who take communion are not doing... Read More
Pope Francis Washes Feet Of Eight Men, One Woman, A Muslim, Ferret, And A Double Amputee
VATICAN–Pope Francis visited the Don Gnocchi Center in Rome today to wash the feet of 12 residents for the Holy Week ritual. According to the Catholic Information Service, those 12 included one woman, a Muslim, a pet ferret named Wilbur, and a double amputee, which falls in line with Pope Francis’ actions during last year’s Maundy Thursday. The ceremony, which is rooted in the story of the Last Supper, made headlines last year when... Read More
5 Memorable Moments From Francis’ First Year
The winds of change blow off Francis’ zucchetto Pope Francis tweeted “Please pray for me” on his first anniversary as pontiff. A second tweet followed shortly thereafter, reading, “For the young adults who know not how to pray, simply close your eyes and pretend your text messaging Jesus with you brain.” Jorge Mario Bergoglio, the archbishop of Buenos Aires, became the Church’s first pope in decades to make practicing... Read More
Jason Evert Gives Chastity Talk To Roman Curia
Members of the Roman Curia and their parents were treated with a chastity talk at the Vatican auditorium this week by well-known chastity speaker Jason Evert. The talk focused on key points from his new book, Theology of the Body for the Roman Curia, covering questions such as “At what stage in the life of someone in the Curia should parents talk to their son about chastity?” and “Tips for parents to help them raise the difficult topic of sex with... Read More
Pope Francis Gets Last F-Bomb Out Of System before Giving Up Cussing For Lent
VATICAN–His Holiness Pope Francis shocked the world today during a Papal Audience when he let one last F-Bomb fly before giving up cursing for Lent. “Those of us who are attached to the pleasures of this world, such as gambling, amassing wealth, or being addicted to having [expletive]…I mean, having fun…must make an effort this holy season of Lent to put aside the pleasures of the world and turn to our Messiah for healing and comfort,”... Read More