Questions Arise After Mother Neglects To Remove Hysterical Child From Mass

Eugene, OR––In the immediate aftermath of the Mass in which parishioner Heather Thomas neglected to remove her crying child to the cry-room during the homily, family of the 26-year-old mother were quick to blame the non-removal of the child on the supposedly crowded pew in which they were sitting. Thomas has yet to speak to reporters regarding the incident which left many parishioners absolutely flabbergasted at how someone could be so clueless... Read More

Parishioner Agnes Day Excited About New Vatican Crackdown On Her Name

Manchester, NH––For over 40 years, Agnes Day, parishioner at St. Luke Parish, has quietly suffered what she called “decades of unnecessary adaptations to her name.” Day, a daily communicant, told Eye of the Tiber how decades ago parishioners began to give her nicknames. “It’s not like they were bad names or anything…they just weren’t mine. Sometimes when I’d walk by, some of the parishioners would call... Read More

« Previous Page