New Diocesan Study: Marital Issues The Number One Cause Of Divorce

  A shocking and controversial new study out today by the Archdiocese of Los Angeles found that a vast majority of divorces are caused by marital issues. “Our figures undeniably show that a more than average amount of divorces in the United States have been the consequence of married couple not liking each other enough to want to remain married,” Archdiocese representative Kirby McClintock told the press, adding that the study was a particular... Read More

Breaking: Your Side Will Win The Midterm Elections Today Because Of Your Comment On A Facebook Post

  In what many are calling a spectacular turn of events, pollsters are now saying that the midterm election today will be won by your side because of a single, passionate comment you wrote on a friend’s Facebook post close to one month ago. “I was a little drunk when I wrote that comment two months ago. In fact, I didn’t even remember writing it until a friend brought it up today. And I gotta be honest—two months old, but the comment still... Read More

Local Rad Trad Gives Wife Permission To Receive Communion

  Admitting that his wife had done a “fairly good job” being subservient to him this week, local SSPV man Randall Thomas acknowledged Wednesday that he was satisfied just enough with his wife to allow her to receive communion this Sunday. “When Margaret Elizabeth and I first got married, she was really on her game,” Thomas said, watching his wife sweep the kitchen. “We had some great times while she cooked and cleaned and did nothing else... Read More

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