“Screw It, Just Canonize Them All,” The Vatican Says

VATICAN––The Vatican this morning is announcing that every pope that has ever lived, including ones still living, is to be canonized by the end of the year, sources are confirming. The news comes just a week after John XXIII and John Paul II were canonized, and a day after it was announced that Paul VI was to be beatified later this year. A Vatican insider told EOTT today that Pope Francis... Read More

SSPX Vehemently Protesting Canonization of St. Peter

VATICAN––Members of the Society of St. Pius X have stormed the internet and radio waves in violent protest against the upcoming canonization of Pope Simon Peter I. The backlash was worse than expected by the Holy See, and the protesters have not pulled any punches. One commentator on a popular tridentine website morecatholicthanthepope.com wrote, “This is the guy who denied Christ three... Read More