Pope Emeritus Benedict on Papal Interviews: “The Concept of Preventive Clarifications is Not in the Catechism”
Speaking to journalists at his residence inside the Vatican this morning, Pope Emeritus Benedict answered journalists’ questions concerning the currently debated question of whether or not the use of preventive clarifications is acceptable for Papal interviews. “It is important not to attribute simplistically the comments made by the Pope during many of his off-the-cuff interviews to error,”... Read More
Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI Asks To Be Reinstated As Pope
According to reports yesterday, Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI is seeking the chair of his pontificate years after his resignation. The news has sent shock waves around the world. Vatican spokesman Fr. Vitateli Devitiamani told EOTT that, “He came for a dinner as scheduled and then proceeded to return to his old living quarters. That wouldn’t be a problem, since His Holiness Pope Francis... Read More
Germany Abdicates World Cup Championship; Argentina To Assume Title
BRAZIL––The German National Team today stunned soccer fans across the globe with their announcement that they would abdicate the World Cup title, effective today. FIFA, the international governing body of association football, said today it has voted the largely unknown Argentinian National Team to assume the title of champions of the soccer world. In a statement issued today, the... Read More
Pope Francis Apologizes For Prank Video Message To Evangelicals
Pope Francis is apologizing this morning after it was revealed that a video of the Pontiff calling for “communion” with Protestant communities was actually a prank. In a candid video taken from an iPhone earlier this morning, Francis expressed regret for the video sent to a recent gathering of Charismatic and Pentecostal ministers hosted by Kenneth Copeland, in which he stated that he desired... Read More
Pope Emeritus Benedict Glances At Cover Of Time Magazine Again, Discreetly Wipes Tear From Eye
VATICAN–Sources close to the Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI reported that the Holy Father has been silently obsessing over Time Magazine’s recent choice of Pope Francis as “Person of the Year.” “He got up as usual this morning,” said one source, “said his morning prayers and celebrated Mass. Then he sat down to check Yahoo News with his morning tea, like... Read More