Family Fighting For Good Seats At Christmas Mass With The Zeal Of 12th Century Crusaders

Reporting that he and his family had been forced from their aisle seat just minutes after acquiring it, 48-year-old Brenden O’Malley told EOTT moments ago that he would “not rest till his aisle seat was once again reclaimed.” “Beset, as I was, and routed from my aisle seat by congregants that only attend the Holy Mass on Christmas and Easter, my family and I surrendered... Read More

“We’re Taking All The Good Seats On Christmas, And You’re Gonna Stand There And Like It,” Nominal Catholics Report

YOUR PARISH––”We’re taking every pew and every freaking seat in the house tonight and tomorrow, and you’re just gonna have to stand there and like it,” bitter Christmas/Easter Catholics told the nation’s practicing Catholics yesterday. “If we have to suffer and go, then you’re gonna suffer as we take your favorite weekly spot. You know which one…the... Read More