Woman Who Believes Church Has No Respect For Women Can’t Wait To See Fifty Shades Of Grey

South Jordan, UT––Citing the Catholic Church’s centuries old “tradition” of misogyny and overall hatred toward women, local Catholic Debra Wilhelm told friends and family today that she, nevertheless, could hardly wait another moment for the release of the new Fifty Shades of Grey film.

“The Catholic Church is not only one of the most anti-woman institutions in the world, but it has also been led by some of the most chauvinistic men, whose violent and carnal sexual appetites could’ve made Satan blush,” Wilhelm said of the Church as she flipped through her heavily marked and highlighted copy of the erotic romance.

“If we allow unenlightened and unsophisticated Catholics like Matt Fradd to continue putting a spin on the Church’s sexist attitudes, the Church will continue to treat us like we’re lesser beings,” Wilhelm continued to say as she sat in a hand basket wondering where she was going. “Women will never be able to attain the dignity we deserve. The hierarchy of the Church will continue to bind us, restrain us, and subjugate us, always looking for a way to make us submissive to their selfish desires. They will continue to deny us the right to freely hand over our own free will to a rich, sexy man.”