Müller To Build Vatican II Theme Park

VATICAN–Speaking to the press Wednesday afternoon, Prefect of the Congregation of the Doctrine of Faith Archbishop Gerhard Ludwig Müller announced plans to create the first ever Vatican II theme park. “We’re very thrilled about the opportunities that the theme park will bring to the Church. In particular, we’re excited to see how it may become a tool for fostering a culture of open dialogue within a fun and exciting setting,” Müller said, before giving reporters an inside look at one of the rides being developed for the park. “We have many rides being developed as we speak, but one of my favorites is our state-of-the-art ferris wheel where Vatican and SSPX officials can sit down and discuss the important issues of Vatican II while going around in circles.” An SSPX spokesman later told Eye of the Tiber that they reject the premise of the theme park altogether, and that they plan to dissuade their followers from entering, saying, “It is an evil theme park; that is the correct term to describe it…not invalid or illicit, but evil.”